Four weeks ago, we attended the memorial service of one elder in the family who passed. Sitting in church reminded me of how much I enjoy the sacred quietness that is so characteristic of traditionally designed churches, cathedrals, and synagogues. And then – if the latter is host to a traditional pipe organ – I love it even more.
A couple of rows in front of me, a late-thirties / early
forty-year-old male was scrolling his social media pages on his mobile. Truly
disrespectful, I thought…
In fact, it also reminded me of what I dislike about these
spaces - people and their general disrespect – the whispering before, after, and
during the service. Really… get with the programme!
Although it is natural to pass on, the suddenness of some of
these occurrences is truly traumatic. The processes involved in acquiring all
the required documentation, postmortems and so forth, can be extremely
traumatic, especially when the people involved in these processes absolutely
disregard even the simplest of dignity and courtesy towards the deceased and
the family.
But then, I took many detailed pictures at post-mortems during
my time with SAPS. Postmortems are not for the faint of heart. A body, on that
stainless steel table, represents, for most officials present – and brace
yourself for what I am about to say – nothing more than muscle and bone - a
piece of meat. Your fame, money and whatever status you claimed during your
life, means zero, niks….
I must hasten to say that I have attended a couple of postmortems
where the body was treated with utmost respect and care by the pathologist.
This is not the norm, though.
I have always maintained that, if there is one thing that will
blow your ego cover to infinite scraps and humble you for the rest of your
life, it is attending a postmortem.
Be that as it may, these experiences refocus one’s priorities
and spotlight those things in your life that present and require authentic
value and care. Family is one.
Life is a handful for most at this time – the government is a
mess and we as citizens need to take hands -ground ourselves within the
traditional value of good humanitarian principles which – just by the way – has
zero/zilch to do with the colour of your skin or the balance in your bank
account. It is about caring for others as you would care for yourself. Just
remember – self-care, not selfishness, is a priority if you want to care for
others.
To not care for and about yourself is selfish and brutal because
it will bite you in the long run.
What are your thoughts about this?
